Creative Carcinoma
This is a guest post by Robbie Mckinney, 40, who was diagnosed with Stage 1 clear cell renal cell carcinoma in 2021. Robbie is a writer/creator born and raised in West Virginia and lives in Pennsylvania with his wife, Lyndee.
They say 2020 was a bad year for everyone, but my body decided to do it on “Hard Mode.” I started the year with a messy divorce that left my life looking like a jigsaw puzzle that was thrown down a flight of stairs. So I’m 35, divorced, haven’t achieved anything of significance, and still don’t know who I am or what my purpose is.
Enter my Mom with the ultimate “Mom move” who introduced me to Lyndee. By the end of the year, I wasn’t just surviving; I was engaged to the most incredible woman I’d ever met. Life was finally playing fair. Or so I thought.
In the fall of 2021, I went to the ER because my gut felt like it was losing a fight with a lawnmower. The doctor walks in and says, Good news, it’s just diverticulitis. Bad news, there’s a tumor on your kidney. You need an oncologist. In an instant, the world shattered again. I looked at Lyndee — the woman I’d just promised a “happily ever after” — and saw the tears in her eyes. That was the moment I realized I didn’t have time for self-pity. She needed me. I locked in. I squared myself away. I prepared for battle.
A month later, the oncologist walks in wearing a grin. I’m thinking, “Great! He’s about to tell me the ER doc was hallucinating or something.” I haven’t been that wrong since I thought my first marriage was a good idea. He says, “You have clear cell renal cell carcinoma,” like I have a medical degree. Then, said it’s kidney cancer, but we’re just going to chop half your kidney off, and you’ll be fine!”
On December 21, 2021, I left half a kidney on an operating table and didn’t really know what was next for me. Recovery was long and brutal due to complications, but all of that gave me the one thing I never had: Permission. Permission to stop playing it safe. So, I started writing. One of those childhood dreams that we all have but never seem to have time to pursue.
Fast forward to 2026. I am 40 and cancer-free. Lyndee and I will be celebrating our 4th year of marriage in April. I have around 300 first drafts, several of them polished and ready for the next phase. A literal stockpile of “Mystery” and “High Strangeness”. I’m not just a survivor; I’m a creator building a legacy, and perhaps I can help others get through the dark times.
If every story has a moral, then I’d guess mine is sometimes you have to walk through a dark room to find the light switch. I will always be a misfit who likes writing about bizarre stuff, but I’m also highly motivated, and I’m just getting started.