My Hero, My Dad, and How he Saved my Life

This is a guest post by David Miller, 61, a hospitality consultant and kidney cancer survivor based in Freehold, New Jersey.

Growing up, my dad — Lewis Miller — was my hero. He was the person I looked up to, admired, and modeled myself after. He owned his own business, worked tirelessly, and rarely ever slowed down. He was always on the go. Some of my best memories with him are simple ones — talking sports, our weekly Wednesday trips to Carvel Ice Cream, and Sunday mornings at the deli and bakery.

In August of 2003, when he was 61, my dad began showing what seemed like simple cold symptoms. A couple of months later, he started experiencing night sweats, which led him to see his doctor in October. An X-ray revealed a mass on his kidney. More testing followed, and an MRI confirmed what no one ever wants to hear — he had kidney cancer.

By the time of his diagnosis, it was stage 4 renal cell carcinoma. The cancer had already spread, and there was little that could be done. Just weeks later, on Tuesday morning, November 26, 2003, my dad passed away. The speed of it all was devastating. His death was incredibly hard on our family — on my sister and me, and especially on my mom. He was so young.

Sadly, my dad’s older brother, my Uncle Ed, had also battled kidney cancer several years earlier. He survived at the time, but later developed lung cancer, which we believe stemmed from the renal cell carcinoma spreading.

Those losses shaped the way I looked at my own health. After my dad passed, my doctor recommended I get an annual kidney ultrasound. I was turning 40, and given my family history, he wanted to make sure we stayed ahead of any possible issues.

Fast forward to June 2014. I was 50 years old when I went in for my annual ultrasound. A few months later, in October, I sat in my doctor’s office for my follow-up. He opened the report, and I could feel the air in the room change. He just stared at the papers in silence for what felt like an eternity. Finally, he looked up and said words I’ll never forget: “You have what appears to be a tumor on your kidney.”

He immediately referred me to a specialist, who, after reviewing my case, felt it was too risky for him to proceed. He worried that removing my entire left kidney would leave me too vulnerable, especially given my family history. Instead, he called Fox Chase Cancer Center in Philadelphia. Within an hour, Fox Chase reached out to me and things began moving very quickly.

That’s when I met Dr. Alexander Kutikov. His approach was different. He wanted to save my kidney, not remove it. He recommended a robotic partial nephrectomy — removing only the tumor and leaving the rest of the kidney intact. On December 29, 2014, I underwent surgery. Thankfully, it was successful. The tumor was stage 2 renal cell carcinoma. Just like my dad and my uncle, my cancer was in my left kidney.

The months and years that followed were filled with regular CT scans — first every three months, then every six, and eventually once a year. I’m grateful to say that today, 11 years later, I am cancer free.

Looking back, everything happened so fast. My focus was simply on getting healthy and taking care of the situation. But I was never alone. My wife, Pam, was by my side every step of the way, taking such good care of me. My family and friends surrounded me with love and support.

One day, my brother-in-law Al said something that stuck with me: “Your father saved your life.” And he was right. Without my dad’s journey, I may never have been monitored so closely. My doctor, Dr. Scott Druckman, who insisted on yearly ultrasounds, and Dr. Kutikov and the team at Fox Chase Cancer Center all played a part in ensuring I’m here today. But it started with my dad.

Through this experience, I’ve learned a few powerful lessons:

• Kidney cancer is often silent. Nine out of ten patients have no symptoms. That’s why screenings are so important. A simple ultrasound once a year can literally save your life, it saved mine.
• Kidney cancer can sometimes hide. Renal cell carcinoma can show up elsewhere in the body later, as it did with my uncle. Annual testing and long-term vigilance are critical.
• Genetics may play a role. About five years ago, I was asked to participate in genetic testing at Fox Chase. While no specific gene was identified, it did highlight something important — my four children should begin testing at age 40, ten years prior to when I was diagnosed. Until the gene can be identified, this monitoring will be their safeguard.

Finally, this journey has reminded me how precious life is. My dad’s passing and my own diagnosis taught me to embrace each day as a gift. Let the small stuff go. Enjoy your family, your friends, and the moments that really matter. Every single day is a miracle.

I am also fortunate to now give back. I’ve hosted fundraising events for Fox Chase and, each year, Pam and I are honored guests of Dr. Kutikov at the Annual Fox Chase Cancer Center Gala. Supporting their mission feels like a full-circle way to honor my dad and my journey.

This past June, I turned 61, the same age my dad was when he passed. It struck me how very young 61 is. I believe everything happens for a reason. After my dad’s passing, both my personal and professional life flourished in ways I never expected. I carry him with me in everything I do. My dad, my hero, continues to guide me daily. And in the end, through his own story, he saved mine.